What a fight before our wedding showed us about our marriage

Exactly one week before my wedding, my then fiancé and I had a pretty big fight, and the way it happened proved to me that we were ready for marriage. Allow me to explain.

He had just gotten a new work-from-home job, and he mentioned to me he was worried he might lose touch with one his guy friends from work. It could be an “out of sight, out of mind” type of situation, he thought, and that disappointed him.

I am close to this co-worker’s girlfriend, so I texted her asking to make sure that they still invited us to things. I mentioned my husband was worried that it would be easy to forget us since we weren’t in their day-to-day lives anymore.

This was no big deal to me, as I would have done this with any of my friends if I was the one worried. My husband, however, is a very private person, and sharing his feelings like this makes him feel very uncomfortable.

Later that day, my husband told me that this guy friend had texted about hanging out. My husband is a very smart man. He had his suspicions about his friend reaching out on the same day that he expressed his concerns to me. As we talked, I eventually confirmed I had reached out to his co-worker’s girlfriend about his worries.

Cue the very tense twenty-four hours from the evening of my admittance to the evening of the next day. When I realized how upset he was, it broke my heart. I also began to get anxious about our relationship, worried that we wouldn’t ever be the same again. But as we fought and resolved our conflict, I discovered two very valuable lessons I was meant to have reinforced as we headed into marriage.

Click over to Verily to read about these lessons!

Johnna Wilford